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Let us believe in healing at Willow Creek

15 Wednesday Aug 2018

The Healing of Willow Creek

Misguided loyalty harmed this historic congregation. True loyalty can redeem it.
MARK GALLI| AUGUST 13, 2018
The Healing of Willow Creek

Image: JLM

In light of the resignation of its pastoral staff and elder board, it’s time to rally around Willow Creek Community Church with support and prayers. With those resignations, and the repentance they suggest, Willow has an opportunity to enter into a new fruitful season of ministry.

Christianity Today
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JULY/AUGUST 2018

Let’s ponder what has happened in the last few months and why, because a simplistic reading of the events will only tempt Willow—and any Christian institution in a similar crisis—to react in such a way that the fruitful season will wither away all too quickly. Many women have come forward and said Bill Hybels has abused his power and sexually harassed female colleagues. The current leadership, pastors and elder board, have failed early to take seriously the accusations being brought forth. We are wise to try our best to grasp the moral and psychological complexities of what has taken place, so deep redemption can take place.

Rediscovering True Loyalty

Given the number of troubling testimonies about Hybels’s behavior, it’s easy to forget we’re still dealing with allegations and not proven fact. Many are of the opinion—me included—that he is guilty. Hybels, however, continues to deny many of the most serious allegations. It’s not merely an American thing but is also required of Christian charity: The accused are entitled to their day in court. For independent churches in Willow’s situation, that court is the sort of independent investigation that Willow has at long last commissioned. An independent investigation will hopefully be able to bring to light the full truth of the matter. The choice of the organization to investigate, as well as its work, are certainly matters to keep in prayer.

The current pastoral leaders and the board have shown both courage and humility in resigning. That in itself is an act of repentance, and for that we can be grateful. Without excusing the leadership, we do well, however, to note why staff and boards who otherwise show signs of wisdom are tempted in a crisis to downplay accusations and protect their leader at all costs, for they do it often.

One reason for many is loyalty. Loyalty is an especially precious virtue in mission-driven organizations, especially in an age when missions are so easily undermined. We do not want to hire staff or form boards whose first instinct is to suspect the leader of the worst after every accusation.

And here is the rub, because loyalty is more complex than we first imagine. We tend to think that loyalty means always taking the side of the leader to whom we want to be faithful. Loyalty instead means doing everything in your power to make the leader not only a better one but a more faithful disciple of Jesus Christ. It’s not unlike patriotism for one’s country. The true patriot loves his country; so much so that he will speak out when he believes the country is doing wrong, to call the nation to adhere to its deepest ideals.

In the face of substantive accusations, then, it is not a betrayal to look seriously at accusations in a way that the truth will come forth and not be covered up. It is an act of loyalty—for the sake of the leader’s integrity.

Loyalty to the leader continues and drives even deeper when it appears that the leader is guilty of a shameful offense. That’s when the leader needs the loyalty of a true friend. This doesn’t mean denying or excusing wrong behavior. At such times, it means standing with them, praying for and with them as they begin to wrestle with wrongdoing and hesitantly, awkwardly try to repent. Because it is inevitable that in such crises, leaders usually do not have the spiritual wherewithal to confront every aspect of their sins immediately. Repentance is a hard and fearsome thing. We need God’s powerful grace to repent, and that grace is often communicated by patient and loving counselors who can help lead us to a proper and deep repentance.

But loyalty is more complex still. Pastoral staff and boards are also called to be loyal to their congregations. This is one reason leadership at every level is so hard and why it tests the best of men and women. Staff and boards often feel they have to choose between loyalty to their leader or to their congregations they are called to serve, and they often end up choosing one or the other. This is what has happened at Willow, and not only with the board. People are either for the congregation, and especially the women who have come forward, or they have been for the staff, board, and Hybels. But loyalty and love require that we parse how and in what ways we need to be loyal to all parties, even when we believe one party has made grievous errors of judgment or has been immoral.

Of course, all these loyalties are grounded in our loyalty—that is, faithfulness—to Jesus Christ, who has demonstrated his loyalty to us, even while we were sinners.

Going Forward

Some have said that Willow staff and elders have been too loyal to Hybels, and some argue that boards should not be so loyal. As the argument above suggests, we beg to differ. Instead, we believe boards should be even more deeply loyal to their congregations and to their pastors—with all that loyalty requires.

One question now is who is going to be loyal to those who have just resigned? And to Bill Hybels and his family? And what does loyalty look like now for those who remain and those who will be called into leadership? Who will be approaching any who have erred and sinned and have wreaked havoc? Is there anyone offering them prayer and support, inviting them out for coffee and conversation, being willing to listen to their story—all the while prodding them to deeper repentance and righteousness?

Many are saddened and rightly angry at the way the initial accusers of Hybels have been either ignored or slandered. That is a terrible thing. But it would only make matters worse if those we believe who have acted disgracefully are shunned in turn.

More than anyone, of course, the accusers of Hybels—those women who have apparently been bullied or sexually harassed—need people to rally around them. This nearly goes without saying. But the gospel calls some of us to rally around the accused and guilty, as well. What loyalty and love looks like in each situation is different, but in the end it should be a combination of honesty and grace, tough love and tender mercy, that leads one and all into a deeper relationship with God.

In short, our love and loyalty must span the breadth of innocence and wrongdoing, of wisdom and malfeasance, if we are to discover a redemption that truly heals.

In this painful moment, Willow has been given a divine opportunity—that is, a chance to be born again. It is entering into a season of self-reflection and repentance, which begins with that independent investigation. If it allows it to be a season, not something to be rushed though, it will see the slow and steady growth of grace set deep roots. May our prayer simply be the promise of the Lord in Amos (9:14–15), when he announced he would bring his people back from exile:

They will rebuild the ruined cities and live in them.
They will plant vineyards and drink their wine;
they will make gardens and eat their fruit.

I will plant Israel in their own land,
never again to be uprooted
from the land I have given them.

Mark Galli is editor in chief of Christianity Today.

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My birthday prompted some ideas.

26 Tuesday Jun 2018

I am now 69 years old. I don’t know if my current ideas will wear thin or get stronger, but I have been thinking about something for days. I read a lot of great articles. I read things written by people I really respect. I listen to podcasts that are quite mind-bending.

I noticed over the last few years, I have played it rather straight and safe on my blog. Maybe it’s time to be a bit more myself. I don’t think in safe ways. I’m a risk-taker at heart. But I had not taken the risk of sharing some of my real feelings or opinions on this blog. I’m going to start this summer at this my 69th birthday.

This first article I am sharing isn’t that mind-bending, but it is a spiritual challenge. It’s written by Soren Johnson, the son of one of my dearest friends, Ginger. Soren writes for the Catholic Herald. This article reminds us about taking time to enjoy “spiritual retreats” along the way, maybe even daily.  Taking the time to seek God within the time we have each day. I love his writing and more, his challenge….and it was published on my birthday.

Stoplight as soulcraft

Soren Johnson
6/22/18
First slide

“In the middle of life,” writes poet Tomas Tranströmer, “death comes to take your measurements. The visit is forgotten and life goes on. But the suit is being sewn on the sly.”

In the lead-up to the day on which my measurements were taken, my 80-mile round-trip commutes had devolved into a monotonous blur. My head bobbed up and down with the newest email, text or call. Nearly every stoplight or stretch of 10-mph traffic was an occasion to glance down and check. One month’s phone bill indicated 4.8 GB of data use. I nearly rear-ended or sideswiped other cars a few times, and evaded traffic citations — barely. I was getting a lot done.

Then, came the visit. Acute abdominal pain left me hospitalized for two days. After I was discharged and the issue was resolved, all I could see were limping, bent-over people everywhere. I was newly sensitive to noise and media. Each day of good health was so bright with relief that the phone seemed largely devoid of power.

Silence stalked me as I left hospital Room No. 256B and got into the car; it enveloped me on the Metro; accompanied me to the office; surrounded me at unexpected moments of the day and night. After work one day, I went on my first office-to-home, 40-mile silent retreat, never touching the phone. Then another. And another. On these retreats, I called my wife and responded to calls from the kids — but otherwise, silence reigned.

First I began to hear my car’s engine. Then one day I caught the muffled voice of a homeless man talking with the driver behind me at a stoplight. I heard myself breathe for the first time in about a decade, and it was uninteresting.

The promise of those first retreats nearly flamed out. On the Metro or in the car at stoplights, the memories of old consolations returned: all the radio, podcasts, interviews, lectures, and audio books’ unfolding plots. The banter, the news, the learning: all of these worlds were a screen swipe away; these worlds were spinning forward without me.

The stoplight was becoming an unlikely place of soulcraft. I began to jam the phone under my pocket Bible on the passenger seat. On some 40-mile retreats, the phone seemed to pulsate from beneath the Bible and my thoughts slowed to a leaden sludge. On other retreats, the phone’s presence vanished in the face of a memory of my aunt who recently died; a Stevie Wonder refrain that came to mind; a prayer for my children. Faces and voices took turns hovering in the hushed cell of my car. Some retreats led me to brood, and again the phone’s screen flashed, newly suggestive.

Like a professor, silence began to instruct me. This pedagogue was at once faithful yet unpredictable; persistent yet mercurial. On some retreats, I was instructed to think about my deficiencies. On others, silence asked me to inventory the past day — in search of the good. On some days, prayer rose like a phoenix from the ash of my distraction, as silence told me to share in another’s heaviness or joy. Each retreat was unlike the one before.

On one early morning retreat, two pileated woodpeckers swooped in front of me. I braked, suddenly motionless as they began to play hide-and-seek on opposite sides of a nearby oak trunk. I lingered until they took their game deeper into the forest. In the still silence of another retreat, the phone rang. It was an old friend, calling from his morning commute a thousand miles away.

The inbreaking splendor of a pileated or consolation of a friend’s voice are exceptions. Most retreats, I am finding, are bare and unadorned. So far, the unruly zoo of my thoughts seems largely untamed by these attempts at stoplight soulcraft.

Life goes on. The visit is not yet forgotten. The suit is being sewn on the sly, but silence is measuring my life anew.

Johnson is associate director of the St. Thomas More Institute.

© Arlington Catholic Herald 2018

https://www.catholicherald.com/Opinions/Columnists/Stoplight_as_soulcraft/

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February – a time to learn about race relations

19 Friday Jan 2018

Every year at Willow Creek Community Church in South Barrington, IL the focus of Martin Luther King Jr. Sunday is about race issues in America… and in our hearts. Bill Hybels tells a familiar story. It is about himself growing up in a white community and not learning or understanding much about race relations in America or how Christians were doing with the challenges of bridge-building.

This past Sunday he did something different. After his similar introduction he told a story. It was the life story of Martin Luther King, Jr.  He had invited the hundreds of middle school and high school kids from the church to come to “big church” this week to learn and understand more.  Check out this service or sermon at Willow Creek by clicking here. If you have 25 minutes, share this with your children…at least those over 10 year of age (from the grandmother). Divided by Faith
It seems we can assume that we as Christians have a biblical perspective on race. Looking at our country these past few years, it is only too obvious that we may not as we are still in the deep waters of racial conflict and misunderstanding each other across racial divides. Bill Hybels calls his second conversion to understanding the depth of our responsibility in race relations came 17 years ago when a black friend gave him a book to read. He said it changed everything…it is Divided by Faith by Michael O. Emerson. 

We believers in Jesus Christ need to be challenged to take this seriously. Let’s make 2018 a year that we grow in this area.

 

 

 

 

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On this Mother’s Day let’s remember motherless children

08 Friday May 2015

It’s way overdue. I promised to introduce you to some high school kids from Hope for Life Kenya. On this Mother’s Day weekend, I have been thinking about these kids. So many of them have lost their mothers to HIV and AIDS. Many fathers have either died or have foresaken the difficulties of family life plagued with illness and have left. They may or may not come back, but often don’t return until children are past school age, when the kids can take care of him. It’s a common story.

Children never stop needing a mother. God has blessed these 125 children at Hope for Life with a surrogate mother, as only God could do. The director of Hope for Life (HFL) Josephine, has become “mother” to over a hundred kids. Along with her staff helpers, she chose these kids from the neighborhood because of their dire need. She keeps track of them, visits their homes (where many have grandmothers taking care of them), makes sure they have uniforms for school. She oversees their daily food needs and their health needs. She pours her life into them. She teaches them the Bible and how to live a Christ-centered life…all with a great sense of humor and calm. She loves them deeply….all in Jesus’ name. Most come to faith in Christ personally at a very young age. Her mothering and nurturing skills are amazing. hopeforlife.juliandkellyphotos-12 The kids flock to her for a hug or ask her for counsel about life issues. They need her like every kid needs a mom. Josephine is their mom, their hero. She is my hero. I want to help her help these kids. They need our help to stay in school…no they don’t have behavior problems, but they have financial problems….you see they have to pay some hefty shillings (dollars) to go to high school…they have to pass exams and apply to high schools like we do for college.  Because of Josephine and her value of education, 31 kids studied hard and have qualified for high school.

There is a simple way to help by clicking this link to Faith and Learning International.

Anyway… let me introduce you to some of the high schoolers. Most of these interviews were taken in January by the GO Team from Wheaton Bible Church and are spoken in their own words:

Kezia has been a part of Hope for Life for nearly 10 years. Since she was a little girl she feels that getting a good hot meal every day has been very impactful on her life. As she has gotten older the other huge blessing is getting help with her school fees. Now that she is in boarding school, she comes to Hope For Life on weekends and plays piano and sings at church. She hopes to be a musician when she grows up.

Kezia

Kezia

At home Kezia helps with cooking, especially loves to make chapatis and ugali. She cares for the cows and really loves animals. At HFL she works in the garden on occasion and mostly helps in the kitchen. When asked if the girls always cook and the boys work in the garden, she laughed and said the girls try to mix it up, but the boys aren’t very good in the kitchen. She has learned to knit and dress hair at HFL and now shaves the boys heads during her vocational skill training on Saturdays.

kellylemonphotography.interviews.michael-1

Michael

Michael is 17 years old and has been a part of the Hope for Life family since he was 8. His 16 year old sister Kezia is also at HFL. He is in his second year of high school and likes school a lot, especially Chemistry and Math.  Someday he would like to be a cashier, as he is very good with numbers. On the weekends, Michael takes computer classes and electrical skills classes at HFL. He also helps with the children, but his greatest love and talent is in music playing at church either on the keyboard or drums. He loves to sing and is in the gospel dance troop at church as well. Michael and Kezia’s mother is HIV+ and there are 4 in the family. His mother ran away when the kids were young but has returned and reconciled with the grandmother. Once Michael was sent away from school for lack of school fees and he ran away and became a shepherd, but life was so difficult that he returned. He is back in school and growing into a very responsible and teachable young man.

kellylemonphotography.interviews.daniel-1

Daniel “Mbugua”

Mbugua’s  mother died when he was 4 years old and his younger sister Virginia was 2. At that time he was very sick, suffering from a severe skin problem.  After the mother died, the four children joined Hope For Life. Josephine helped with his medication to heal his skin problem. But after 6 years the father of the first 2 siblings showed up and said he wanted to take his children. He was HIV+. His older sister ran away.

Mbugua was terribly affected when his older siblings were gone and he and Virginia were left behind to live with the grandparents. Although he struggles in school because of the stressful environment at home, he graduated from 8th grade and has made it to high school. He plays the keyboard in church, sings and composes music. He is also a good dancer in church worship dance group.  Mbugua wants to be an airplane mechanic.

Josephine and Virginia

Josephine and Virginia

His sister Virginia has “adopted” Josephine as her mother and frequently leaves her grandparents to stay with Josephine. I have known Virginia since she was 4 and she has grown into a wonderful teenager with a bright and godly spirit.

God has rescued these motherless children by sending Josephine to their neighborhood. Now they are adopted into His family forever. To be adopted as sons of Jesus Christ is a concept that will take us until eternity to fully comprehend. The truth is that when I am around the children from Hope for Life Kenya, I get a glimpse of spiritual adoption from many angles. God cares about these children like the father that He is.

Galatians 4:5-7 ESV 

To redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God.

Matthew 18:5 ESV 

“Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me,…”

   

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